Lawnmowing

Lawnmowing

Marianne Toilet –

I would take you up to my bed

Give you a night that goes straight to your head

I would make you scream in 10 different ways

 

But I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

 

I’d be the best lover you ever had

I’d be better than Ron Jeremy or even his dad

I’d be so good your mother would scream!

 

But I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

 

Oh it’s so very unfair

The things I could do to your rear

But I have no testicles to spare!

 

‘Cause I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

 

Ahhhhh!!!! I lost my balls! I had balls, but now I don’t! It feels weird, like lonely!

Ahhhhh!!!!

 

So now I’m so very alone

Incapable of getting a bone

I’m a eunuch, GOD DAMMIT!

 

‘Cause I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

EVERYBODY!

Crowd –

‘Cause I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

‘Cause I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

‘Cause I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

‘Cause I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

I lost my balls in a lawnmowing accident

(with Marianne Toilet crying over the last line)

I lost my balls!!! Ahhhh! (crying)